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segunda-feira, 13 de outubro de 2008

Justiça *dos profundos abismos aberrantes*

Como ela poderia saber?

Sentia a textura da madeira antiga sob os dedos, deslizando-os pela escrivaninha robusta e escura. O rosto de feições frágeis e compleição pálida, parcamente iluminado pela chama bruxuleante da vela que já teimava em não apagar. Há quanto tempo se havia deitado sobre a mesa, naquele canto escuro do ostentoso castelo? O vento que vinha do oceano não podia acariciar-lhe os cabelos louros e de curtos cachos, ainda que insistisse contra as janelas fechadas. O mar, que lhe salpicara o rosto de sardas, ao nascer, agora batia teimoso no rochedo ao topo do qual a construção se erigia.

Ela podia sentir que tudo tentava alcançá-la, vindo de fora, mas naquela noite não cederia ao impulso de escancarar as janelas e sentir a brisa salgada. Seus dedos delicados ainda sujos da tinta, a ponta da pena manchando uma borda do papel e a carta escrita às pressas. A caligrafia, sempre tão bela e fina, ali tremida e irregular.

- Eu... não sabia... não... sabia...

As palavras saíam em um balbuciar quase catatônico, enquanto seus olhos arregalados fitavam as sombras ao redor. Desde o incidente, as noites no castelo se haviam tornado solitárias e agressivas. Ela podia sentir o momento que se aproximava, ouvia os corredores sussurrando em algum dialeto antigo, as pedras ressonavam uma sinfonia canhestra. Mas não aquela noite. O lugar se deitara silencioso, junto com o sol, e ela sabia o que isso significava. Por isso a carta. Quisera explicar a alguém o que ocorrera, mas a meio caminho do papel decidira apenas tentar desculpar-se com ele.

"Eu não imaginara que pudesses ser um anjo, meu Micah. Desculpa esta tua tola, onde o tenhas enviado, mas não deixai que o destino seja negro. Nada sabia, nada sei... que preço tôrpe pagarei, ó meu amado, pelo sangue de teu peito cascateando em meus seios? Pela lâmina que lhe atravessei no espanto, sob a imponência de tuas asas? Que alguém tenha piedade de minh'alma, amado, pois quis crer que não haveria horror maior que o de privar o mundo de teu sorriso. Meus sonhos. Por Deus, quando meus sonhos me mostram o que fiz. E que horror antigo será meu carrasco! É o teu sangue, ele não sai das paredes nem da cama! Ele me cobre toda noite, na lascívia daqueles nossos últimos momentos. Em momentos de um prazer insano, como punição por meu crime. Micah, perdoa-me. Eu nunca soube..."

As lágrimas molhavam o papel, a dor era imensurável. Àquela última releitura, o Carrasco lhe adentrara o quarto, tão silencioso quanto ela sabia que seria. Um horror amorfo que deslizava pelo chão, centímetro a centímetro, e agora levantara-se por trás dela, como um lençol pulsante indefinível de olhos, presas pontiagudas e garras. O abraço a dilacerava e não deixara-lhe forças sequer para gemer de dor... apenas lágrimas, enquanto sentia o romper da pele, de músculos e a carne deslizar pelos próprios ossos.

Até ali, ela quis crer que dor alguma superaria a daquela perda. Sentia-se tola, imersa no frio de ter todo o sangue sugado de seu corpo, devorada por aquele ser horrendo. Mas viveu o bastante para ver surgir, do topo daquela massa inominável, o mesmo par de asas de que se recordava de ter visto, às costas dele. E esvaiu-se de vida, sentindo-se a mais ingrata das mulheres. Sua mão, indefinível entre osso, pele e carne, amassando a carta, no gesto derradeiro.

Como ela poderia saber? Perdida na estúpida visão do tão somente óbvio.

50 comentários:

Tyr Quentalë disse...

Li. Li sem conseguir respirar. Mergulhei no abismo das linhas escritas aqui, onde a culpa se torna o mais monstruoso ser.
Li. Li sem conseguir piscar, deixando meus dedos tocarem estas sombras que ganham formas, no pranto e na dor de alguém que desconheço.
Li. Li e fechei meus olhos. Suspirei ao findar do texto, pois sei muito bem o quão incrédula ficara tal ama ao perceber o óbvio que estava tão somente ali.
Suspirei. Suspirei prolongadamente, pois sei meu caro Rei o abismo que habita essas almas com asas imponentes, que são os mais belos, mas podem ser os mais terrificantes que outra alma pode vir a conhecer.
Amei. Como não haveria de amar?
Pois ainda me encantas em tuas linhas, sejam sombrias, canhestras ou não.

Tyr Quentalë disse...

*ficara tal alma

Poisongirl disse...

Fiquei presa a essas palavras meu caro.Estou sem palavras ...

iara disse...

lindo, lindo texto meu amigo.
final apoteótico. amei
bjs

Troll disse...

TYR:
Existe esse temor, das linhas aqui descritas. Esse medo ao se ver as asas e perceber que quem nos acompanha pode ser tanto mais. Ver isso nos olhos de alguém é conhecer a ignorância, uma pena... e minhas sombras crescem, como poucos sabem notar.

POISON:
Que a dubiedade do que aqui escrevi seja apenas mais um toque em sua mente, caríssima. E que minhas palavras sempre te envolvam mais.

IARA:
Sim, esse texto realmente mexeu comigo, quando enfim o havia terminado e o reli.

Lyn Monroe disse...

Texto absolutamente fantastico, como so vc escreve.
E essa musica de fundo perfeita p se entrar no clima?
senti o vento uivar, e os sussurros do corredor daqui!
Adorei!

Lee Holloway disse...

Este palácio é mesmo cheio de surpresas! Os textos e as músicas criam todo o clima pra gente que vem visitar o Troll.

Mais um ótimo texto, doutor!

Beijos!

Taynar disse...

Porque os teus textos sempre me lembram alguma outra coisa que eu não consigo identificar?
Aquela sensação latente de Dejá vu...

Morreu como viveu, creio eu, a dama loira, de cacho curtos.

Beijos, Detective!

Aimê Elisa disse...

Só agora li seu post e nele de certa forma me vi.
Não pelo cachos curtos e louros, não mesmo! Mas o sentimento que ali ficou.

Assim me sinto, "Perdida na estúpida visão do tão somente óbvio."

Ps.: Vc não tem noção de como!

Beijos! Até mais ver...

Troll disse...

LYN:
Clima é tudo, não? *rs* Esse texto realmente é daqueles q vc começa querendo escrever uma coisa, passa pra outra no meio do caminho e quando chega ao fim, não reconhece o q saiu, mas gosta! Tenho essa relação, com ele.

LEE:
Dra, caríssima! É tão bom tê-la mais, por aqui. Fico feliz q curta minhas palavras e o bater dos tambores do Palácio. Tudo escolhido a dedo. ;-)

TAYNAR:
Precisamos decifrar isso, não é mesmo? Onde existe esse toque, esse elo. *rs* Mas fico muito feliz em ter seus olhos a passear pelos murais do Palácio, sempre.

ELISSA:
Pois algo que tem me feito afeiçoar-me muito a esse post, são as tão diferentes reações a ele, mas todas com algum grau de identificação. Minha experiência em escrevê-lo foi curiosa. Quando estava terminado e comecei a reler e revisar, percebi q ele me falava bem mais de mim do q das idéias q tinha tido inicialmente, para esse. Fiquei um pouco receoso com ele, a princípio, mas agora bem feliz com o resultado. Por favor, volte sempre. Volte mais vezes. :-D

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